Today is what appeared to be an ordinary and a regular Wednesday morning and I'm not sure fully what happened other than feeling discontent.  Talking to Ben I couldn't help but feel really emotional over this recent burden I have.  I have this serious desire to live real genuine life with people.  I want to raise my kids together and help my kids see the power of believers coming together to live life and minister.  The model of community I have always seen in church today is to come together once a week and be with one another for a time of encouragement, but I am starting to feel that it's not enough.  I want real life together, where you can't hide because your closest friends are your neighbors.  I want to share meals, things and lots of time as families together who want to love the people around them.  I pray that the Lord will show Ben and I what this looks like or if this is even possible at this point in our lives.  Just    some of my thoughts it feels good to write them down.  Now back to my 1 year old with a poop filled diaper and my daughter who has watched far to much t.v. today...ugh.