Summer is here!

This is a post I started in June and never finished so I am going to finish it now!

The kids are home, it feels great...I love spending time with them!  The last day of school was May 25th, after a closing assembly in the morning we headed right to Timber Wolf YL camp in Michigan for the long weekend.  The week leading up to this I had gotten a nice cold and several stressful circumstances had happened that week, I felt pretty run down.  The beginning of the trip I let life get to me and did not handle it very well but by the end I could stop and appreciate the people we were with and the incredible environment we were in.  This will be something we do every year, the kids loved it!  Some of the highlights were:  Joy (Ben's sister) came with us, Joy, Jack, Kate and Lucy all did the zip line (I am even scared of that), Jack did the ropes course and drove a slick track race car, Lucy caught some fish, we all kayaked, we ate as a family 7 times and I didn't have to cook,serve or clean up any of it!

This week my excitement has mounted as I have the kids home with us I can see changes in them, positive ones.  Jack has become softer, Kate has felt rested, Lucy is growing confident in who she is and Sam well his cuteness meter is off the charts.  I feel like this is a result of our time together as a family and the amount of  time we can encourage them individually.  We actually have time and energy to do the things we always long to do through out the year.  I am talking about simple things like reading to them, all of them!  Playing games, watching movies and helping Ben date them individually.  I love summer break and I think I am going to love schooling them at home even more next year!

This is going to be another year of changes and major faith steps, we are looking forward to what's ahead but any confidence you see in me comes from the Lord.  Like I said we will be home schooling and as of May 5th we started the adoption process, eek this is so scary!  I feel like this is something we have talked about for so long, but now it's happening.  We wanted to start about a year ago and we over and over again felt like the Lord was telling us to wait till Sam was 2.  That was hard to swallow at times but now looking back I can see that it wasn't the right time and I appreciate the ways He has grown us since to prepare us.

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As I read and looked over the things I wrote I think I was just too chicken to post it since I said that we will be home schooling next year and adopting, those are just really big things for us.  I know I was putting pressure on myself to have answers for those that might ask me "why?" are we making those choices.  I still don't have all the answers but the Lord has built up more faith in me that we are walking in the right direction for our family.

So we are 2 1/2 months into the adoption process!  I am officially paperwork pregnant.  We are adopting through American World Adoption agency from Ethiopia.  I feel like God asked us to move forward in faith, each day I can see his vision for us more and more clearly.  We are of course only in the beginning stages and it will likely be 2 years before we meet our daughter or son.  So we will continue plugging away at paperwork and praying for the Lord's provision and guidance.

March-April

I finally remembered my blog log-in, kinda shows how long it's been since I have posted.

The last 2ish months have been filled with lots of great things, but also a few things that were sad and will stay with me for a long time.  Grandpa Roessler passed away in March and Grandpa Gautraud in April.  It's funny how teary eyed I can get when a memory is sparked.  I am thankful for the years I have had with them in my life!

If you know the Davis family you know that March through August we celebrate one birthday a month. We had a family birthday for Kate's 7th and a friend birthday for Lucy's 4th. Next Wednesday is Sam's 2nd birthday, firetrucks, Thomas the Train and super heroes here we come!

Lucy had 4 friends over and they made pizza and decorated cookies!

Joel and Kerry welcomed their daughter home in March, it has been so fun to share in their adoption experience.  We are very inspired by them.

My parents celebrated 33 years of marriage, we enjoyed a catered dinner from Pompilios and a night full of laughs at my parents house.  It was so wonderful of my mom to pull it all together.  My dad prayed over the food that night and it was so sweet to hear him choke up when he prays about his marriage, my mom or shows thanks for my grandparent's marriage.  I appreciate the genuine love he has for his family and the Lord. 

School is almost done and I am so excited, it's hard to continue to get up at 6:20 with great Joy, I am looking forward to May 25th!!!  In the last couple of weeks school has been far more manageable, due to a very simple schedule Ben implemented.  The kids know exactly what to do when they get home and our expectations.  Too bad I didn't figure that out a few years earlier.

     This is just a fun picture I found from one of those warm evenings in March.

Sam seems to be the entertainment/ highlight of the house lately.  A line often said to him by Ben is "Sam, don't you know your still one."  Sam often does or says things that seem so mature.  Potty training is one of my favorite examples.  If you ask my thoughts on potty training a child I will tell you that I don't even try it until 3 yrs. old because my kids weren't interested until then.  At 3 it would take a week and we would be done, instead of begging my child to use the potty.  Well Sam has decided in the last month that he is ready.  He likes to climb up on the big potty by himself and poop, yes poop on command.  All my kids were petrified to poop and especially on the big potty.  For a couple of nights in the evenings he would need to poop and while he was on the potty he wanted me to flip through a Family Fun magazine so he could look at it, those are things that make me smile.
...Last night we were putting him in bed and he said "It's too hard to be Spider man...I tried it."  Ben asked,  "How do you be Spider man?"  He then turns his hand palm side up as if shooting a web, he then says "I tried it, I watched it"  He looked pretty discouraged about the whole situation, maybe another day he can figure out how to be Spider man.

This pic is from November but the look he gives is the very same Sam look I see most everyday.

Season of grieving

Death has become a very familiar word in our household lately, we are possibly nearing the death of our 3rd grandfather since January.  In January Ben's grand daddy passed away very suddenly and this is where it all begun this year.  We were unable to make it to the funeral due to finances and long travel, which was very hard and sad.  This is the first time that we had some real conversations about family and what it means to each of us and where we want to go with our children and relationships with relatives.  I think it was a good time of reflecting how important it is for our children to know who their great and grad father and mothers are, this is what will give them their rich family history and help shape them as individuals.  We spent time reflecting and thinking about these things, and in no time did God help us put some of our lessons to practice.

In February my grandpa Roessler was diagnosed with cancer and was in and out of the hospital.  In mid March he passed away at his home.  This was the first time in a long time that I have experienced so much grief.  This was the first of any of my grandparents to pass away, I didn't know how much that can hurt.  There are not many people who can say that they have known me my entire life, but he was one of them.  It's so strange how memories have come flooding back of the interactions or talks I've had with him.  I think this is the Lord's way of helping me grieve and heal from a loss.  It was really sweet to see the way my children grieved Kate and Jack understood more than the younger two.  They both on several occasions cried and recalled the way they love and will miss him.  Since, it has been fun to recall who grandpa was and how he has impacted their lives.

Yesterday while at the zoo my mom received a call from my dad letting us know that his dad in Michigan was ill and not likely to recover.  Uggg...so hard!  Why is this a part of life, I guess it's an incredible reminder of sin and the reason we can't live forever on earth, without the hope of Christ.  Boy will eternal life be amazing, to never deal with the emotions of death again!  So again I found myself flooded with these memories and emotions.  He has not left this life yet, so my emotions are a bit different but the grieving has already started.  It's hard to tell your kids that someone else who is apart of their life and history will soon not be with us.  Due to geography my kids have not spent as much time with this grandfather but, he just like the others is very much a part of their lives.  It's really difficult to know that the next time we travel to Michigan we will not be with him.  This leg of my journey is not over but the Lord is surely showing me the Hope he has set before me and has used saints that have gone before me with some incredibly comforting words.  I have spent the last two weeks reading Corrie ten Boom's book He Cares He Comforts...so, so wonderful!  

Attempts at who I want to be.

"The person you someday want to be, you are now becoming."

This is the quote I have been focusing on lately.  Ben has said it several times I am not really sure where it came from, my guess is from his days of selling books.  I was thinking one day recently after he said it, "Who is it that I want to be?".  The things that came to mind were things like a woman who is a powerful prayer warrior, someone who aims for a healthy body but is not consumed by it and someone who cares enough about creating history for her kids through documenting stories and pictures.  I could come up with a list of 10 more things but this is where I stopped and focused the last week and a half. 

Recently a friend and I have decided to come together weekly and pray, along with fasting the same meal together.  Wow this has been powerful, why have I chosen to skip one of the most intimate parts of a relationship with Christ and with another believer?  Since we started a couple of months ago I feel like I see how the Lord yearns to connect with us in this way.  This very simple time together has bonded us in a way no amount of time spent hanging out together would.  I know the art of praying with focus and diligence takes just that and I have a very long way to go!  But I want to make strides daily in engaging the Lord and others in this way.

And then there is health and documenting life, ugh.  We eat healthy in our house and make smart choices with food, lots of from scratch meals with fruits and veggies, for me it was easy to stop there.  I have always found an excuse to not go on walks usually revolving around my kids, but lately we have have thrown those excuses out the window.  My sister in law Kerry said that she would like to be outside with Lyla for an hour a day regardless of the temps or weather, not sure if she kept up with that but it inspired me none the less.  I am the queen of excuses, I love to find reasons why I don't do things.  So I want to be a healthy woman, who also cares about being active and I want that for my kids. I forget sometimes that it is me that they imitate.  I'm proud to say we have gone on 4 walks in the last 7 days with kids, for me that's a big deal!  As far as documenting life this is my lame attempt but I have some ideas cooking and will do my best to do them, not just talk about them.  So I end on the note that I am aiming to do things that will help me be who I aim to be, and to stop the excuses I love to make for myself! "The person you someday want to be, you are now becoming."


Kids and family:

We have been battling the last 6 days some nasty stomach bug that looks like it come and disappears for a day and then will pop back up.  I have 2 home from school today, I am really hoping it will go away soon! 

Ben got home from his 4 nights away on Saturday night, it could not have come faster.  He has to go away every year twice, once in the winter and once in the summer.  In the past I have not handled this well but this year I felt prepared spiritually to handle the kids and life without him.  I think if I'm honest the thing that is the hardest when he is gone is that he is so consumed in business and relationships that there is very little time for him to miss me.  I have all the time in the world to miss his presence for those few days.  This time I did miss him a lot and really longed to just spend time with him but it was different because I didn't buy into the lies that I love to believe sometimes that he must not love me or my worth comes from his words or actions toward me, oh so freeing.

Home for the day and 1&2

What a day.  Last night Sam was up vomiting till 3 am, I think it happened to be one of those lovely Chuckie Cheese germs that caused it.  Jack and Kate woke up with warm foreheads and stomach aches, it seemed like a good day to not go to school especially after Sam's night time performance.  It was such a good and challenging day.  I love to have my kids home it's awesome to see them learn how to play together.  They spent most of the morning playing legos, watching a show, playing trains and so on.  Of course having all four home adds a different challenge to the day which on my own I have not taken that challenge very well.  I spent the first part of my morning drinking my coffee and reading my Bible preparing for my day.  I have had a rough week with my kids no fault of their own but my problem I several times a day have caught myself becoming angry and feeling out of control.  I knew this is not where I wanted to stay, and I could see my kids reflecting my behavior in the midst of it.  So with the Lord sustaining me I was able to have a really great day with my kids and enjoy them as individuals and as a little team.  We took a walk together (with no crying), made dinner and watched Good Luck Charlie.  I was able to get them off to bed with only one meltdown which occurred due to my rash words, dang-it always my fault :)  But they are all sleeping now which makes for a great evening.

I wanted to finish what I stared last night which was to update what's new with each child.

Kate is drawing non-stop still.  She shows others love by drawing them pictures.  Often she is drawing mermaids and unicorns, they are always for someone with lots of thought put into each picture.  Kate is the dominating older sister but she is learning what it looks like to love and share with Lucy and Sam.  If Kate and Lucy are left alone they can get into an imagination world for hours.  I am so glad they have each other it is fun to watch them.  Kate is also very good at math, her teacher says that she understands math concepts before she is finished teaching them (that did not come from me). Kate is learning how to speed up her reading.  She still has to sound out words but is getting faster and faster the more she practices.  Kate and Joy (Ben's little sister) love to play spies when they are together, they run around the house dressed in black watching all of us.  Kate will be 7 soon, that is wild how quick those years have gone by!

Jack, wow this boy is becoming a little man over night.  Jack got glasses recently, which I think he looks really handsome in.  He does very well in school when he works hard.  Jack has a great capacity for memory work.  He still loves to spend late nights reading.  Riddles have been a new love.  The other night our friend Braylen was over and told Jack that he would buy him a $50 dollar Lego set if he could solve a riddle that no other adult he had talked to could figure out, Jack was not scared here it goes "Out of the eater came something to eat. Out of the strong came something sweet." Jack took about 2 seconds and said that's easy a lion that's what Samson told the Philistines.  Braylen and Ben's mouths hit the floor it was a great moment.  Jack is pretty excited to pick out those Legos!  Jack is a great brother to Sam it's so sweet to see him read books at night or watch them play together.  I've even caught Jack sleeping in Sam's crib before.  Sam really trusts Jack and Jack knows it.  I am enjoying this age so much, it's neat to have some really rich and meaningful talks with Jack about life.  I look forward to many more moments with him!

3&4

As of late in the Davis home, life has been full of lots of life decisions mixed with just everyday responsibilities.  We are doing our best to stay on top of the game.

Sam is full of so many words at just 21 months.  I have not come across a word he does not repeat.  Sam loves to push chairs around our kitchen and climb on everything.  I have considered finding a way to bungee the chairs to the table.  As I was getting ready yesterday morning Sam was silent and I know that is never good.  I yelled for him and up the stairs he came with a brownie he had gotten off the counter.  I can see traits in him that are great and if not used right to his determent.  Sam gets his eye and mind on something and he is not easily distracted and will not forget what he wants.  He had been asking for that brownie since the day before.  Sam has been saying "yes mom" a lot and seems to have a very soft and sensitive heart.  We have had to discipline more as of late but it's been really good to see him respond.  Sam warms all of our hearts and makes us all smile.

Lucy loves t.v. if I let her she would happily watch it all day long.  Lucy is a lot like Jack and loves the world of technology.  She often finishes a show than will ask to do play computer and than Ipad and than our iphones.  It's really hard not to fall into the trap of letting her be in front of something often.  I have enjoyed my days home with Lucy, she is really growing up.  Lucy will be four in April and can't seem to understand why we can't go to the beach on her birthday since we did last year and will remind us of it weekly.  Lucy really love little pet shops, it's fun to see her get into a imaginative state and really engage in that world.  Something that I am learning about her is that she moves very slow and in this world that is not something that is valued.  I often find myself trying to change that in her but it seems to be the way God wove her together.  I look forward to understanding that better as she grows up.  Lucy brings lots of smiles to our faces with all her very cute lines.  When I tell her to stop doing something she often tells me "I just can't get it out of my mind".  Lucy as of recent has learned how to do a puppy dog face to ask for things, boy does it make me want to give in.

Well I set out to write a bit today just about life in general but Sam is climbing all over me and taking full advantage of my attention being elsewhere...my hope is that I will get more tomorrow!

Not fair

The subject of things not being fair has surfaced several times this week in our house.  Ben and I had a conversation with a friend regarding life and should life be fair and then driving home the other day Kate after remembering something that Jack got that she hadn't let me know that "it's not fair".  These are such simple words and often said by adults, not just children.  At face value they really aren't a big deal but what I think they can breed if repeated by my children through out life, can be dangerous.  When I say or think that something in life isn't fair often I become very discontent and upset with the one who wasn't "fair" to me.  As I spoke to Kate I wanted her to continue to understand that the God we serve and who is our loving father isn't fair but he is just and he does have our eternal good in mind.  She was pretty heated and I don't think willing to listen at the moment to my words but I am more than sure that this subject will be breached over and over again.  It's been fun to see how the Lord has chosen to use this in my life and as always teach me through my parenting.