The loss

Today I was struck with the emotions of the loss that has to occur in order for a child to enter our home.  I do not take it lightly, it's one of the worse tensions I have ever experienced.  I know my child will have to lose a father and mother and maybe siblings due to circumstances that I can't help or control.  I feel for the family who either is sick or dying and unsure of what might happen to their child.  Or the widowed and rejected  mother infected with HIV and has no other options but to give this child up.  How terribly painful.  I am crying as I contemplate what has to be happening in Ethiopia as those around me are excited to see this child come home to our family.  I want to remember when I am overjoyed about a addition to our family that it came at a great cost to my son or daughter and their birth parents.  Let me not forget the reality and love them with great compassion.  If you're praying for our adoption journey please be praying for this child's heart and the momma that felt the need or had to say good-bye for some reason.

By Faith

By Faith

 

This is a ongoing theme that God continues to work on in my heart.  He is so good and reveals new insights from scripture at just the right moments.  Through the adoption journey I have seen over and over again how a child needs that connection with you as a parent to attach and bond well, this is true for any child!  This is way easier said than done, so I have witnessed.  This thought for me is so easily related to our relationship with the Lord.  Isn't that what Jesus has? A connection with his Father?  Aren't we offered that same connection with the same Father.  "And because we are his children, God has sent the spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, "Abba, Father."  Now you are no longer slaves but God's own child.  And since you are his child, God has made you his heir."-Galations4:6&7.  I am so moved by the thought that we were adopted and and the Lord has offered not a distant relationship but one of the sweetest earthly relationships.  For the last year or so this aspect of the relationship with the Father has been what I see worked out in my life.  More recently I have began to understand a another layer that is pivotal in relationship.  We are asked to have faith, I translate this to mean trust in our Father.  I need to trust as a child trusts their parent.  This is so beautiful when I see one of my children trust me, I mean really trust.  This also is so upsetting and frustrating when one of your children has a lack of trust in you as a parent.  My dad this last week noted a thought during a a Story Form Life group we attended together, I have been processing since.  We as a group were reflecting on Jesus' time on earth and my dad said he has often tried to understand what it means for Jesus to be fully God and fully man, good question.  As we observed Jesus' life it seemed apparent that Jesus often went off to have a time with his Father and through his relationship and connection with his father many miracles and wisdom could be offered.  After He was left in Nazareth by Joseph and Mary and than found in the temple scripture notes "And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man."Luke 2:52 .  What does this mean?  Did Jesus have room for growth in wisdom, stature and favor with God?    I am not going to make absolute conclusions about all of this but I am challenged by the thought that I have the same access to the same toolbox that Jesus had.  As Jesus grew maybe that relationship part with the father took time to grow in wisdom and faith?  I can relate with this.  My dad's thought he shared was that maybe that's all Jesus had a toolbox that included a relationship with the Father, connection that leads to faith. 

I read Hebrews 11 today, it's all about faith.  We are told about dozens of people in the Old testament who acted in faith.  "And it is impossible to please God without faith.  Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and he rewards those who sincerely seek him."Hebrews 11:6 , ugh so simple but yet so hard to act in faith sometimes! 

I can see the Lord in the past has rocked my world with faith steps and when accepted ended in growth but I have a good feeling that the future holds a crazy adventure that will require many faith steps.  I ended my time this morning reading in the same chapter verse 32-40 and was so pumped about what adventure God has in store for me.  Lord rock my world as you did for those who came before us!



The pace of life

Oh how I miss my blog, why is it now that I have a life fuller than I can ever imagine and I'm busier than ever that I long more than ever to just write life down?  I think I am a little afraid I will forget all that went on and the things I felt in this time of life.  With my 12 minutes at the computer before I need to scoot on with my day, I'll try a quick update.

 

 

Adoption:

 

We finally received our finalized home study!  I sent off the paper work called the I-600A to our government, this will give us pre-approval to bring a child home when!  Once I receive the US approval I can send my dossier (all the paper work I have been collecting since May) to my agency and they can send it to Ethiopia for approval.  Once approved by Ethiopia we then wait until a child is matched with our family by our agency.  Oh I know the Lord has someone already in mind for our family.  He has given us little glimpses of his vision.

 

 

Homeschooling:

 

Before Christmas break my answer about homeschooling could change by the minute.  I have never ridden a ride of emotions like I did August to December.  I think the break was great and the time allowed me to refocus and ask myself why I would do something that felt so hard.  I see now the fruit of just plugging away and doing the thing we feel God has called our family to.  We are learning how to not just get something done so it can be checked off the curriculum box but instead how to interact properly with one another in a loving, graceful way.  I am finding out that my reason (discipleship of our children) for home schooling is playing out different than how I thought it would.  I originally thought we would get assignments done and than I would have a separate meaningful time with each child throughout the week and talk Bible with them.  It is the daily grind, piano, math, language arts, chores, history, science, geography and so on that I am having a chance to guide,train and direct.  I see that they truly imitate me and that is scary!  The moment I am stressed or loose my Patience my kids are like a scary reflection peering right back at me.  Being with me all day they pick up all my sin.  This has brought me more humility and tears than any other stage of life, but it is worth it!  So if I can keep that focus on home schooling I can put aside my "bad" days and see them differently.  Home schooling is going great only because it's a clear tool for the Lord to work on my heart and than I'm able to better disciple and guide my children!

 

 



Winners announced!!!!!

iPad winners

 

 

 

We were able to giveaway 3 iPads due to the amount of donations, so exciting!!!

 

Thanks to random.org these are our winners!!!

 

 

1. Sally Grunkemeyer

 

2. Angela Druley

 

3. Katie Nuelson

 

 

Congratulations!

 

 



iPad mini fundraiser October 26-November 9th!!!

ENDS AT NOON November 9th!!!



Today starts our second fundraiser for the Davis #5 adoption!

We are pre-ordering 2 iPad mini's to give away.  This will raise $2000.00 toward our adoption fees if all chances are sold!

iPad mini details

Both will be the 16GB Wi-Fi model.
 

 

 How it works:

 

-For every $10.00 donated through our paypal button (below or on the right side of the blog), you will receive 1 chance in the giveaway! 

-You can enter as much as you want.

$10.00= 1 chance

$20.00= 2 chances

$30.00= 3 chances

$40.00= 4 chances, etc.

 

-100 chances max will be offered for each iPad mini, there are 2 iPad mini's, therefore there will be 2 drawings (200 chances total for both minis).

 

-We will draw and announce a winner November 9th.

(If all chances sell before then we will draw earlier.)

 

-We will have a third party draw so that close friends and family can enter.

 

 

Click on the donate button below or on the right side bar:

Leave a comment if you have a question or prefer to mail a check!

October days

I'm sitting here with Sam this morning as he eats his cereal and entertains me with his comments.  I snuck in a little video, I look forward to watching 10 years from now.

Life at home is moving and often it feels fast and furious.  Just when I think I have a child figured out there is a whole new thing to learn about them.  We are well on our way in this home schooling adventure and it's hands down the hardest thing I have ever done.  I still think it's very worth it and beneficial to our family.  I am still learning how to regulate my emotions when our day doesn't go as imagined.




Home school room all set up (it's never looked the same again)



My time with each child is so different...Jack, well he loves individual attention with his studies and if I could hold his hand all day and guide him step by step he would be satisfied.  I am working on his independent learning, this is harder for him than any one subject.  Jack has been so sweet in so many ways.  He loves touch, so if we read aloud he likes to be right next to me and he even may rub my arm or back.  It's fun to have slow moments to see some of that come out.  I am learning that Jack deep down likes to feel challenged but on the surface rejects it.  Jack is very insightful and adds to our group learning in great ways if he allows himself to stay engaged. 

Kate, is a hard little worker when she has motivation.  She works well independently on her phonics and math.  Kate can get discouraged easily if she feels like she isn't grasping a concept fast enough.  I often struggle with wanting her to "just get it".  It's been good to slow down and remember I am her teacher now it's my job to explain things in a way she understands.  Kate started piano this fall and seems to be doing well.  Our time together is good because I need all these little learning opportunities to build a relationship with her.  Kate has an incredible imagination so she will play independently tucked away somewhere this in the past didn't create very many opportunities to connect outside of dinner and bedtime.  My desire for Kate is to see a relationship with her that deepens this year and has depth beyond what she's doing at the moment.

Lucy, oh Lu I wish I had more focused time with you!  Lucy wants to "do" school so bad.  I have a workbook for her and coloring pages but she often rejects those.  I think she would like my undivided attention and for me to be purposeful with her.  She knows when I am just handing her busy work and she rejects it.  I need to find a way to have a focused school time with her.  I know this would tell her that she is loved and thought of.  Often when we are doing school Lucy likes to write in her journal, this consists of squiggly lines across the page.  Lucy loves Starfall a online game that ends up teaching her far more than I can right now.  Lucy likes our history, we have a timeline we are memorizing from creation to present day.  Lucy has the events from creation till 1000 b.c. memorized.  I guess things like identifying letters and number will come eventually.  I have a lot of room to grow in my time with Lucy.

We call this our monkey platter it is often our mid morning snack for all to share.

And then there is Sam, he can be so wild some days or just play quietly others.  I try to pull him onto my lap to participate in what we're doing, he's not that kind of child.  He wants to be doing something constantly with his hands.  I had this little picture of what it might be like before we started schooling at home, so far that is a lost dream.  I hoped that Sam would quietly play with the game or toy I gave him beside me while I taught my other children, boy was I wrong.  I love having Sam around he adds so much entertainment.  If I have been in the basement for awhile with the older ones he will often come down with a snack he got for himself.  He definitely keeps me on my toes.


Sitting the way I pictured.

What really goes on.

                 

No explanation.

                                                                         

That's homeschooling with team Davis in a very small nutshell.

Other things happening in the Davis world...we have two young ladies living with us.  Morgan who has been with us for a year now and is getting married soon.  We are so sad to see her go.  We have already experienced having one girl, Jess, move out that was sad for us and our kids but life moves everyone on.  Last week Amanda moved in with us, she is from Seattle and is dating a friend of ours.  We are in the get to know you stages of life with her.  She will be here only until December.  Tuesday Amanda spent the day with the kids and I helping with schooling and care of the children, it was great to have a hand.  I think the Lord knew I needed a little help this season of life.

We got blood drawn for the adoption.

                                               

Adoption update!!  We are so close to completing paperwork!!!!  We have our last home study visit today.  My goal is to turn in the paperwork in December, from there it will be 4-6 weeks until we are officially on a wait list.  That will be the first time our agency can look at their existing children and consider our family as a match.  The excitement is building as we move forward.  I have a another fundraiser planned, it starts tomorrow.  I hope to order 2 ipad minis and raffle off both.  The Lord has been so amazing in the money department.  He continues to lay it on other people's hearts to donate to the adoption.  We have not sent out anything requesting monetary donation yet I receive checks in the mail and people that are not involved in our daily life saying they want to donate.  I feel at complete peace about the money aspect of the adoption.

Connecting

Oh so much lately...mostly good but sometimes hard.

 

I have to try to be quick, kids are still in bed.

 

*Quick note, garage sale went AWESOME!  $3000.00 raised, we still have a long way to go but that was such an encouraging start, Praise the Lord!

 

Homeschooling, wow am I challenged daily in so many things.  Organization, mentally and physically.  Four kids and so many books, I thought my house was a mess before, now there are not many words to describe it on some days.  We are working on how to incorporate them doing chores/helping out, it's a process like anything else.

Am I still glad we made this choice, Yes, hands down this is still the best decision we've made for our family.  We are all challenged in ways that I am not sure we would've had opportunity for.  I am with my kids a lot more about about 56 more hours in a week!  I am learning this can be a stressful time or a golden opportunity, let's just say I haven't taken advantage of the golden opportunity part as much :/ .

 

I had to refocus this week, why are we doing this?  To educate our kids, right?  Well yes,

but so, so much more than that.  We said we wanted a deep and genuine connection with our children that would allow discipleship, that is the part that is lose sometimes.  I am examining the way I have been keeping the "peace" in the house and how I have been correcting behaviors.  Often that was looking like being a strong disciplinarian, "follow my rules and expectations or else".  I could sense my frustrations mounting and me disliking my children often.  I constantly was thinking if they would just do the things I am asking them to do this wouldn't be a problem and I could remain calm, but guess what I would just come up with new expectations. 

 

This past week I was given a breath of fresh air and reminded of how the Lord relates to us, as I read scripture I see His desire for us to connect with Him, to remain in the vine.  Why am I tipping the scale and focusing on my children following my every command in perfect obedience? Am I scared I will lose control if not and they will become Hellions, well "yes"!  I mean how will they ever be able to obey the Lord if they can't obey me?  These things are all true but I am going about in a way that I don't see modeled in scripture.

 

My new question is, "How will my children learn what a healthy connection with the Lord looks like if it is not modeled for them and encouraged in them?"  Through this connection the desire to obey is present.  I am more willing to sin if I am not connected to the true vine, right?  I have spent this last week focusing on a connection with them.  What does this look like?  Here's some examples:

 

I tell Sam to pick up his toys, He says "no", I then say "let's try again" Sam pick up your toys, "yes mom" and he does it!  This  has been the response more times than not.  We have had expectations to this daily which then has consequences.  If my focus during asking him to do this was simply to pick up his toys, that accomplishes a clean room and a child that can follow directions, but I want so much more.  At the end of me asking and him picking up his toys, I believe that I showed him that I love him and he can trust me.  I took time to be gentle and care for his soul in a way I see the Lord do for us.  I clean with him and have more chances to engage.  Does the Lord just demand things of us and stand back and expect it perfect the first time or else he'll discipline us, no he gives us second chances and does life with us. 

 

I've noticed that I didn't want to ask Sam or my other children to do things because the answer was often "no"and than we would have take a discipline type action and the manner in which it was all happening made me frustrated always with my kids.

 

So I have spoke mostly of discipline but this has been only one way in which we are being more purposeful in connecting.

 

-I have been purposing to say "I love you" that is not based off anything positive they did.

-Looking into their eyes when I speak to them.

-Holding their hand when I ask the little ones to do things.

-Way more kisses and hugs.

-For Jack or Kate especially making sure I actually hear and look at them as they speak.

-Using the line "let's try it again", with the older ones also has given them the message that I care for them.

-I've been aiming to not say "no" as a knee jerk response and to take the 10 seconds to think about what they asked.  Often the answer can be "yes".

-I am focusing on a gentle tone in all the ways I interact with them.

 

If you know me, these things do not come naturally to me.  I often don't want to give unless I think you deserve it.  I am not naturally soft.  I don't love touch or eye contact.  

I think this can apply to most, I won't actually share my heart or go deep in a relationship if I don't feel secure and loved by the person because than I know I can trust them. 

 

This is all a journey but I felt compelled to share where we are.  Blessings in your day ahead!